I have a few issues going on right now but I'll start with the first one, which is that my husband has 2 middle names. What? You think that's crazy? Yeah, me too. You don't even really need 1 middle name, so why 2? I have always thought it was a little much and now, of course, it's causing problems. It was inevitable. Things were coasting along a little too smoothly for a while.
PROBLEM - Parker's big, long, fancy pantsy double middle name, name is so long that it takes up 2 lines on his driver's license. 2 middle names = 2 lines. Isn't that special. But guess what happens folks? His first and middle nameS take up the first line while his last, and more important name, falls to the line below in no man's (i.e. not noticed) land. So all of the final notarizations we had done were for Parker William. As in Parker Andrew William, but we don't use middle names so of course it was just Parker William. And his background/clearance letter from the town of Moraga? Well, it was for Parker Andrew William. CRAP!!! We have documents that need to go to China in like 2 weeks. I don't have time for mistakes and delays. So I ran around town yesterday politely asking for new documents. The notary kindly obliged and apologized, commenting that he thought something seemed "funky" with Parker's driver's license. I said "Yep, it is funky, as in 2 middle names funkin' things up if you know what I mean." He got me and gave me the raised eyebrow and knowing nod. The police chief wasn't in yesterday so I had to stop by this afternoon. I was really hoping they would keep the original date on the letter (February), but they changed it to yesterday's date. That meant a new notarization because the notarization was dated the 10th and the corrected clearance letter, the 11th. I made Parker run out and get it done today before he went to his fantasy baseball draft. I would poke fun at it, because it is really funny to me, but he plays with a bunch of old codgers so I'm biting my tongue instead.
ISSUE - I was totally freaking out about today's fingerprint appointment. I was so nervous I had to pee about every 15 minutes. I haven't done that since my first presentation at PepsiCo. a dozen years ago! (after exactly 1 month on the job). I don't know what I was so nervous about! All we had to do was ... get our fingerprints done. That was it! Easy peasy. But for whatever reason, I was a total wuss about it. Maybe it's because it's the last real step that we have any control over? I don't know. Bottom line, it's done and over with so now we wait for the approval. I just signed up on the USCIS website for email updates. I've read that the approval may be given in as little as 8 hours or as long as 1-2 weeks. All of this waiting is not good for my drinking habit. Better than a problem! Remember that and don't judge! We all have our little issues, people.
CONFESSION - As exciting as it is to announce we have a little girl, it's also TOTALLY FREAKING AWKWARD! Oh yeah, a daughter? Are you pregnant? What, no? Who? How old is she? WHERE is she? I was at a party last night and we all had to tell the group the ages of our kids and where they go to school. I was conflicted. If I didn't mention her, I would feel terribly guilty, but I don't know many of the women in this group that well yet, so to tell them was weird! It's like keeping your pregnancy secret till you're out of the woods and find out the alien in your belly is actually going to turn into a healthy human by the time it comes out, and because you've kept it secret for so long, it's totally anticlimactic by the time you are able to share that it's easier not to mention it and hope people just figure it out and then you just play stupid when they bring it up as if you thought you had already told them, but of course you hadn't because you kept it secret and feel guilty about it kind of thing. Not that I did that, of course. Do you get what I'm trying to say? And even deducting all the run-on sentences of weirdo pregnancy bs above, it's just plain weird to say it out loud. I have a daughter. I have a little girl. It's strange. Maybe it wouldn't be so strange if I hadn't become a mother the more conventional and natural (to me) way 2 times previously? I don't know. It seems pretty ridiculous as I write it. Kind of like worrying about getting your stupid fingerprints taken.
PS! I hope you weren't too disappointed by my "confession" not being something totally juicy like I got botox and filler. Because I did that too, by the way. That's what my husband gets for working every day of spring break!
No comments:
Post a Comment