The Dossier has left the building!

Yesterday was a marathon of errands and somehow everything fell into place.  Not in quite the order I would have liked, but the end result was achieved, and that's what matters the most.

I headed into the city with our little guy directly from our big kid's drop off.  Not even a stop for coffee.  Mommy meant business!  We got to the consulate in about 40 minutes, found a parking spot up front and headed in. Everything was looking great until I realized how long each number in our group (the P group/non-visa group, which we will be part of in the next week or two... ugh) was taking.  Seemed every number took about 10 minutes on average. I started to sweat when I realized we were still a good 15 numbers away from being called and only had 45 minutes to go before we would have to head back to pick up the big kid.  Good thing little miss arrogant skipped the back-up plan!  What an idiot.  Somehow, we magically got called at about 11:50.  We needed to be on the road by Noon in order to safely get back to pick up the kid on time.

Consulate Officer:  "Do you want to pick up your documents today or next week?  Or we can mail.  Did you bring an envelope?"

Me:  "Well, I would prefer to pick them up today, of possible?"

CO:  "Okay, be back between 1:30 and 2:30."

Me:  "What happens if I can't get back by 2:30?"

CO:  "We close.  You have to be back between 1:30 and 2:30.  Or you'll have to come a different day then."

Me:  "Oh no, it's okay, I'll be back before 2:30."

This wouldn't normally be an issue .. BUT .. I had to drive back, pick up the big kid at 1:02 then hightail it back to the city, find parking and get in before 2:30.  And throw lunch at the boys somewhere in between.  I tried not to stress and just focused on the mission before me.  Autopilot back to Moraga.  Picked up the big kid with time to spare.  Threw Burger King at them on the way to the city.  Which, by the way, they totally loved because the meal comes in this little box type thing with the old school crown sticking up along the back by perforation so they can just tear it off and wear it when they're done.  And the big kid said "Hey, mom, these chicken nuggets are waaaaay better than the chicken nuggets at McDonalds."  Well, that's good.  At least they ate it!  Anytime I take them to the golden arches, it's like pulling teeth to get them to eat. Duh, the food is awful. Makes the happy meal toy sort of a good idea as at least it's a bargaining point, for kids who actually eat real food with real flavor and real nutrition.  We made it back to the consulate at just after 2, got a spot on the same block and were in the building by 2:10.  Time.  To.  Spare.  Got in the "cashier" line and by the time we made it to the front, it was about 2:20.  And guess what?  Our documents weren't done yet.  Figures.  So we waited another 10 minutes and then 600 bucks later, we were out the door, documents in hand.

When we got back to the car, I re-read the dossier instructions and realized I also needed a cashier's check for the translation services in China.  Ugh.  That meant yet ANOTHER stop before sending it out overnight to our coordinator.  Pedal.. to the freaking metal!  Stopped at the bank in Orinda.  Thank goodness for more junk food.  Our bank always has fresh baked cookies in the waiting area.  I told the boys if they sat quietly and waited patiently for me to get the check that they could have a cookie on our way out.  It would have been a breeze for them.  See what depriving your kids of junk gets you!  But.. BUT.. for the chubby little cookie monster who stormed the place with her mom.  I know anybody who saw me could read the disgust on my face.  Said chubster walks in and her mom tells her to wait there while she gets her stuff done.  Chubby grabs not one, not two, but three cookies and starts gobbling them up Cookie Monster style. No shit!  My kids didn't know what to think. They just stared; jaws on the ground.  I kinda think they were as grossed out as I was. I mean, seriously, if your kid has a serious weight issue, do you really think you should let her pig out at the freaking bank?  If that's what she does in public, how in the world does she eat at home?  She probably had Burger King for lunch too.  Man, some parents totally suck.

Back to my kids.  I got my check, placed it neatly into the awaiting envelope and walked back over to them.  Little guy said "Now can we have a cookie please?"  They each grabbed a napkin and a cookie and we headed out the door. As soon as we hit the sidewalk, the little guy, who is clearly maturing by the minute (he waited until we were outside.. HUGE!) said "Mommy, did you see that girl totally chow down on THREE cookies?"  That's my boy!

We got back into the car, and hit the road yet again.  Next stop UPS store.  While I was driving I just quickly glanced through the dossier requirements one last time. As if the last 2,544 times hadn't amply prepared me.  But alas, I missed one small detail and that was to put the 2 extra passport photos of me and Parker in a clear plastic sleeve. I had to stop at home. And somehow get to the UPS store by 3:45ish to make it into the day's shipment. Crapski.  Raced home, left  the boys in the car, ran in, grabbed the clear sleeve and hit reverse all within about 1 minute and 30 seconds.  Made it to the UPS store just as the driver was loading the truck.  Thanks to my friend Doug, our dossier made it into that shipment and arrived safely at the coordinator's home office this afternoon.  I had this big plan to take a photo of Doug with our dossier envelope in hand, but was in such a rush that I wasn't able to.  You'll have to meet Doug another time.  There will be a few other instances, for sure.

When I got back in the car, without the documents I've been working on and toting to and fro for so very long, I thought I would feel elated and overjoyed but I didn't at all. I felt a small sense of relief but that's about it.  I am having a hard time giving in to any emotion, though the cynicism seems to be working for me (I'm sure you could sense it ...).  My friend's health crisis is weighing heavily on me.  I'm not sure how to even manage the emotions twisting inside of me.  It's hard to let my own feelings out when I'm so torn up about the situation she is in.

I haven't been sleeping well.  But I had a dream last night in which Macey appeared. It was magical. It wasn't just a dream with her in it, but it was about our first meeting. She came into the room with her caregiver.  She smiled at us.  She went over to our little guy and stole his toy.  Then she came over to me. I kneeled in front of her.  She put her little forehead to mine and put her pudgy little hands on my shoulders.  Then she looked up, smiled and started to babble.  It was amazing and I didn't even remember it until I was pulling into the pick up line at my little guy's school. Until then I was wracked with emotion from my visit with my friend and as I turned into the semi-circle driveway at preschool, the memory of my dream hit me.  Oh little Macey, how I can't wait to meet you!

It's funny how our children teach us parenting lessons, long before we meet them.